Like Blueberries

Others surprise me - over and again. They say, "Just be happy!" I hear and read it everywhere all my life. As if it’s a law of nature. As if everyone knows what happiness is and know its definition by heart. As if it’s ready to be picked like ripe blueberries on a bush, ready to be eaten.

Sometimes I feel as a stranger in the desert. Whispering in the wind: the definition of happiness is historically and culturally biased. As if not a single person is listening and realizing the impact of that truth. It should make us 'homo sapiens' more humble and less selfish.

One Definition Fits None

And my definition? My personal opinion is that happiness depends on one's level of consciousness. In other words there's not one definition. One definition fits none. 

Look at Maslow's hierarchy of needs. On the 'Physiological' level Epicurus' definition is valid: "The cry of the flesh bids us escape from hunger, thirst, and cold; for he who is free of these and expects to remain so might vie in happiness even with Zeus." On the level of 'Safety' I'm happy when there's peace in my part of the world, my job pays well, my own house needs no maintenance and my kids are doing well. Kate Bush's definition "loving and being loved" fits to the level of 'Love/ belonging'. When I write another nice blog that's received well, I'm happy on the level of 'Esteem'. Level of 'Self-actualization' is looking at life and planet Earth like this and this.

What makes me most happy? É simples: ter você.

Beminnen en bemind worden

To be honest. I'm fascinated by the definition of happiness. There are so many definitions! I guess my first wonder was born when I was eight years old - or am I idealizing myself on this? Remember what I wrote before? "What a bore is life and how predictable: to be born, live and die." This is what I told my maternal grandma at the age of eight after reading next week's TV-guide completely. She looked at me with a little, mysterious smile and said "Yes, you are right". I was old at the age of eight. The strange thing is this feeling never really left me. In retrospect my opinion back then was only a part of homo sapiens' life truth. In life, it's not about milestones, it's about all the days in between."

Next to that, I keep on puzzling on what people Say and how they Act. Sometimes the gap is so big and obvious. Why are they fooling themselves? Do they really think that no-one observes the 'Say-Act-Gap'?

Last week in my newspaper there was an interview with Kate Bush. Kate shared her definition of 'perfect happiness': "(Giggling) The point of these questions come down to this  'Loving and being loved'. That's what all of us want."

I can't tell if there is a 'Say-Act-Gap' for Kate. She could have referred to the image in her song 'Symphony in Blue' that she is needed for the symphony. This is taking care for procreation. She did not. She could have talked about her moment of enlightenment she refers to in her song 'Somewhere in Between'. She did not.

It's down to earth for her. Kate loving and being loved. That's all. Husband? Secret lover(s)? God(s)? Her son? Parent(s)? Friend(s)? Or ...?

In Dutch it reads "Beminnen en bemind worden". Was she referring to 'loving and being loved'? Or 'making love'? She was giggling! Or referring to both? 

P.S. Source: NRC weekend, Maart 2012, page 66.

Bike shed

Look at your Twitter timeline. Take a good look! What do you see? Do you see a bike shed t:):)?

Twitterers give disproportional weight to trivial issues. Weather. Showing off. Holidays. How to ... - whatever.  Taste of food, book or music. What colour, shape or touch to give to another gadget. Opinions on TV programs, politician's opinions or the government's output. More opinions.

If Twitter really reflects daily life of species 'homo sapiens' then those tweets prove - according to me - that life is not about the pursuit of happiness. It's about trivial issues!

Or! Or is this the ultimate proof that there is a private & offline 'us' and an online & public 'us'? In private we think, talk, dream and act according to happiness? And online: we're never too deep for the fear of being shown to be insufficiently intelligent or informed?

Happiness as 'Open of Heart. All senses sharp. Stripped of Unsavory.'

In a way we as species invented 'happiness'. The oldest definition on what a 'happy' life is, is the Homeric (3rd century BCE) definition of 'happiness' as 'luck'. More 

We do not know how our pre-historic ancestors defined happiness. Why not? Because they did not write down what they thought. How about other groups of our ancient ancestors who used written words, sentences, letters and books for nailing down what they thought important: record inventories, raising taxes or changing information with others? Did the ancient Egyptians have a word (or words) for 'happiness'? How did they define 'happiness'? After all they invented an alphabet (the oldest?) around 2700 BCE. That's more than 2,400 years before Homer! 

This year I invested time to find out what ancient Egypt's definition (or definitions?) of 'happiness'. I wrote a couple of e-mails to Egyptologists - never got a serious answer. Searching on the internet. Read three books for background information: Toby Wilkinson/ The rise and fall of ancient Egypt (2010), J. Vergote/ De godsdienst van het Oude Egypte (1987) and John Romer/ Ancient lives: the Story of the Pharaoh's Tombmakers (1991). 

The 'Thesaurus Linguae Aegyptiae' gives only one hit on 'happiness' or 'happy': pxA-jb. I checked out the three short references. Most interesting is Wilson, A Ptolemaic Lexikon (1997), page 364:  

Here 'pxA-jb' is translated as 'open of heart', a heart that is 'happy' or 'cheerful'. The earliest example of 'pxA-jb' is used by Thutmosis I (footnote). His reign dated from 1506 to 1493 BCE. He was a pharaoh - 18th dynasty - from the Ancient Egyptian's New Kingdom. 

Intermediate. Ancient Egyptian's definition of 'happiness'? 

• Old Kingdom. No written word for 'happiness' 
• Middle Kingdom. No written word for 'happiness' 
• New Kingdom. 'pxA-jb' = Open of heart. A heart that is happy, cheerful, joyful, without sadness, all faculties sharpened. Perhaps brought by drinking wine or beer. A state where someone has all faculties sharpened, before he loses control. 

Wilson's addition (better: translation or interpretation) of "without sadness" fits with the ancient Egyptian concept of paradise. For them 'paradise' were the 'eternal reed fields' (Aaru). Fields very much like those of the earthly Nile. Ideal hunting and fishing ground. A place where the deceased was entertained by beautiful and perfect women, sailing trips, music and merriment with friends. And the 'sadness'? Work was done by serfs!

Hypothesis. Ancient Egypt's definition of 'happiness' = Open of Heart. All senses sharp. Stripped of all the Unsavory Aspects.

Question: Do you have better information on ancient Egypt's definition of happiness? Or is it just another stupid question?

Footnote. 'Urk IV 267,7' = Book IV, page 267, line 7 from 'Urkunden des ägyptischen Altertums'. Source

pxA-jb

Did the ancient Egyptians have a special or distinct word for 'Happiness'? I still don't know. I've been searching the internet for an answer but did not find anything substantial as yet.

A couple of years ago I read with great interest Darrin McMahon's book 'Happiness. A history'. Nice and interesting :) What I missed in this book is how the ancient Egyptians perceived happiness.

The 'Thesaurus Linguae Aegyptiae' gives three references on 'pxA-jb':
Wb 1, 542.18 = Erman and Grapow, Wörterbuch der ägyptischen Sprache, Bd 1 (1935), seite 542

FCD 93 =  Faulkner, A Concise Dictionary of Middle Egyptian (1962). Not accessible via the internet. Should I buy this book? It's still for sale.
Wilson, Ptol. Lexikon, 364 = Wilson, A Ptolemaic Lexikon (1997). Not accessible via the internet. Should I buy this book? It's still for sale.

Still looking for an answer on these questions:

1. Did the ancient Egyptians have a word for 'happiness'?

2. How was this word (or words) used? In which context? Did it's usage change during the long history of ancient Egypt?

Will You Go?

13 days left! Only 13 days left for visiting @VonderandBloom's 'Around the World in 80 Days Tour' at Schiphol Airport (Amsterdam).  I would love to go and see those two girls playing their lovely music: Brilliance of You and Little Dreamer.

Would love to but I think I never will. For me there's no need to visit Schiphol this year. Next to that there is no urgency for me right now.

'What to do next?' must be one of the most puzzling questions of our time and age. Work. Kids. Partner. Book. Film. Concert. Meditation. Hobbies. So much to do. So much distraction. And still only 24 hours in a day.

Question: 'Visit VonderandBloom at Schiphol somewhere in the next 2 weeks?' What to do according to Epicurus (341-270 BC) and Stephen Covey (1932-)?

Epicurus: Satisfy Your Natural Needs

According to Epicurus we should strive for natural needs. When these needs are satisfied we should stop striving. Is visiting VonderandBloom a natural need? Is friendship, listening to music a natural need? I can't tell. Can you?

Covey: Put First Things First

Our tasks  should be based on importance rather than urgency according to Covey. Evaluate whether your efforts exemplify your desired character values, propel you towards goals and enrich the various roles and relationships of you. Prioritization is the key to the success of any business or in any walk of life. Is visiting VonderandBloom important? If I visit them recreational with my wife or a friend I would build on a relation (Q2). Or is it just trivia or pleasure (Q4)? It's all up to me. It's all up to you. Isn't it? Isn't it always? 

Sources. Epicurus: natural needs.  Covey: first things first and time matrix.

Moments Like These

It's not the moment that a subject pops up. It's not the comments. It's not the RT's. It's not the compliments. It's the writing of these sentences in a blog that makes me happy.

To be more exact. The very moment that I realize that I wrote down another memory, dream or opinion makes me happiest. Most of the time this happiness glows in me for a few seconds. Sometimes for a few hours.

Today and tomorrow this blog feels like mine. In a few weeks from now I'll recognize the words I wrote before.  But in a way it's no longer mine. It could have been written by anyone.

Question: Does this ring a bell?

How to Satisfy a Man Every Time?

How to Satisfy a Woman Every Time?
Caress her, give her compliments, hug her, charm her, let her enjoy, massaging her, fix things, empathize, sing for her, give her support and food, calm her, raise expectations, allow her to have her way, flatter her, encourage, cheer her up, hug, ignore fat pads, excite, give her rest, be protective, call her up, anticipate, be forgiving, give her jewels, entertain her, carry things for her, be polite, fascinate her, give attention, confidence, defence, clothing, brag about her, treat her as a princess, agree with her, pamper her, embrace her, die for her, dream of her, flirt, agree with her, squeeze her gently, please her, make her your idol, adore her.

How to Satisfy a Man Every Time? Do you really want to know? Yes!

Lillies of the field. Coincidence?

Look! Look at the lillies of the field! They don't work. They are not worried about what to wear, eat and think. They don't puzzle about the "revolution" in Egypt. They are not distracted by the ups and downs of love. They are not worried about their kids.

Aristotle asserts that plants - a lily is a plant - possess a vegetative soul, responsible for reproduction and growth. Plants don't move and are not sensitive like animals. Plants don't think and reflect like 'homo sapiens'.

I'm fascinated by the fact that vegetative organisms seem very similar to happy people. They coincide. They are identical. It's something that pops up in my mind every now and then. That puzzles me for more than 25 years.

Last week I was strolling a little. Killing time because my two daughters had their weekly gymnastics. I passed a house. In it, two people (man and wife?) sitting in their livingroom watching TV. They seemed to me perfectly happy. They had everything they need(ed): food, drinks, love and shelter. All they did was breathing in and out. In and out. In and out. Just like a plant. Without the need to #move or #dream.

Questions:

• Are happy people/ couples identical to plants?
• What is the definition of happy/ happiness?
• What is my blind spot on this?

What's your opinion?

You know?

Only 200-300 years old! Did you know that all our present day focus on I, Me and Self is a highly biased perspective? It's a Western Enlightenment view on life of species 'Homo Sapiens'. It's only a couple of 100 years old. 200 - 300 years old! Surprised?

Twenty years ago I planned to write "someday" a book on the history of happiness. Four years ago I realised I don't have to write it anymore. It's already written by Darrin M. MacMahon in his book 'Happiness: A history'. I read it 4 years ago. Back than I needed a mirror. I needed something that dried my tears and cleared my head. Reading Darrin's book worked perfect for me. 

In a way we as species invented (better: have been inventing) "happiness". The definition on what a happy life is changed a few times during history (source):

• Homeric.  Happiness = Luck
• Classical. Happiness = Virtue
• Medieval. Happiness = Heaven
• Enlightenment. Happiness = Pleasure
• Contemporary. Happiness = A Warm Puppy

It's my birthday today and I cry if I want to.

Epicurus on happiness: escape from hunger, thirst and cold

Epicurus: "The cry of the flesh bids us escape from hunger, thirst, and cold; for he who is free of these and expects to remain so might vie in happiness even with Zeus."

This quote of Epicurus (341-270 BCE) is my favourite definition on happiness. Simple. Easy. It's something all of us (better: I) sometimes seem to forget.

Anyone read 'The Pursuit of Happiness' by Darrin McMahon? Why should you? Because it tells all of us that the definition on "being happy" changed a few times through history. It's only a definition, it's not a natural law of the human species.

Question: What's your definition of happiness?